shitposts and ideological arguments

[holographica]

THE JAMJAR NETWORK POST MEME


I know 'em, you know 'em, we all know 'em. Those networks posts that don't always make perfect IC sense, but they're forever popular because they're so damn fun. "Hypothetical" moral questions. Accidental videos. 3AM oversharing. Effortposts. Contrived pleas for advice. Love 'em or hate 'em, jamjar networks are like...the peanut butter to DWRP's jelly. Or something?

HOW TO PLAY:
- Toplevel with a network post. Conversations take place in generic assumed jamjar settings where everyone's in (roughly) one place and can text each other.
- If you have any preferences about the genre or specifics of that generic assumed jamjar, or if you want it to be in the setting of an established game, or anything like that, say so.
- Reply to people's network posts.
- INSTANT GRATIFICATION

Comments

hagakure | dangan ronpa | ota

[thirtys]

[ooc: presumably this takes place in some jamjar setting with ghosts but you know it doesn't even matter honestly it's hagakure.]

I THINK THERE'S A GHOST IN MY HOUSE HELP

[lostcompany]

Dude step one get out of there!!

What's it doing?

[thirtys]

I DON'T KNOW I'M HIDING IN THE BUSHES OUTSIDE [he wasn't about to fuck with no ghosts] HOW DO I PERFORM AN EXORCISM

1/2

[spookybloobloo]

oh

sorry

i'll get out of your way

2/2

[spookybloobloo]

wait

[calmdown]

That's probably my bad. Sorry.

I'll try laying the bait down at a different house.

[Look, sometimes the monthly task list is weird. Who is Yu to turn them down?]

Kawasumi Mai | Kanon

[nojohnyouare]

[Mai hasn't been heard from for hours, but she suddenly posts to the network:]

...I don't remember which floor I'm on.

Elise | Story of Seasons

[announcemyvictory]

Ugh, why won't this place call an exterminator!? There are bugs! Everywhere! Isn't it common courtesy to spray?

[they're. on an island.]

[letsplayer]

dude you can just squish it if you wanna kill it THAT badly

this world's bugs are weak and cannot survive a simple human shoe

[announcemyvictory]

Are you serious? They could get into our sleeping quarters.

Kara Zor-El/Supergirl | DC Super Hero Girls

[maidofmistakes]

Guys? I know it's kind of a given that everyone misses home, but... let's say you can't go home. I mean, you can go back to where you were, but not home home. What do you do then?

[calmdown]

[Hmm...]

Find a new one.

It's not easy... but sometimes you luck out. And if you can, it makes everything worth it.

[maidofmistakes]

...yeah, I guess so. Is this place like that for you guys?

Hallelujah | SMTIV:A | ota

[lostcompany]

Have you ever, like, remembered something from ages ago, and it's not like you'd ever really thought about it before, but all of a sudden you realize "man, that was kind of screwed up"?

Or maybe not screwed up, maybe you just realize something you totally missed.

Have you ever had that feeling?

Re: Hallelujah | SMTIV:A | ota

[letsplayer]

i think that's a pretty universal human experience

but as an ancient proverb says

hindsight's a fuck

i remember as a kid there was some weird fucked up shit that i was exposed to that i didn't really pay any attention to, since i didn't understand how screwed over it was at the time

because i was a kid

and everything went over my head

[lostcompany]

Good old ancient wisdom. You can always count on a guy with a beard for advice.

That's...about right. I'm starting to think people can just get used to anything.

[windbreak]

[i don't have the willpower to do it rn but this is badly typed ok]

Hey, better ages ago than last week, right? It happens.

What was it, anyway? Something incriminating?

[lostcompany]

If it was I wouldn't be able to say it. You'll never know. [ha ha!...ha...]

What happened last week...?

[suspicious]

HA HA HA HA HA

[detectiveforhierophant]

[...]

You have no idea.

[Seriously. Dojima was still up some nights kicking himself mentally for missing what he should have noticed all along.]

[lostcompany]

It makes sense coming from an adult.

[since you like...change when you get old, right

isn't that how it works??

so it's less weird then.]

Marla Sanzashi | Pokemon OC

[letsplayer]

[Sooooo as part of the part-time job system, someone got a gig dog grooming. She holds up a tiny pug, exposing its chest for the world.]

WHY DO DOGS HAVE NIPPLES?

Re: Marla Sanzashi | Pokemon OC

[newstart]

You've never seen a dog with nipples?

[Uh, say what?]

Zephyr Taiyoh | RWBY OC

[butlaserstho]

Guys. Guys. This is important.

[Those who know Zephyr will know that it is not, in fact, important, and that she says this like every other network post.]

It followed me.

[She points the camera up at the ceiling of the room she's in. There's a pillow there. Just chilling on the ceiling.]

I tried to get it down, because you know, new universe, new rules and all, but it didn't work. I tried lots of things.

...On a related note, does anyone know how to remove frozen wood pulp from AC vents? Or actually, just break it up? The cedar smell is kinda nice.

OC, meet an AU. is slightly assumed CR OK?

[newstart]

Could be a ghost? D'you want me to see if Achlys can move it? Hilbert plz. she hasn't met your ridiculously pink jellicent, yet. Just your giant grass snake.

...How do you get frozen wood pulp in AC vents?

Kyubey | Puella Magi Madoka Magica | ota

[servanda]

Hey, tell me: what's the one thing you really, really want most of all right now?

I know it's inconvenient for everyone to be stuck here, but don't let that stop you from seeing the bigger picture!